My Thirty Third Date

We chatted over bbm for about a week. His picture was cute but his profile said he was 5’8 which is a bit shorter then I am attracted to. We had a few good conversations over the phone and I agreed to meet him. He said that we should meet half way so I met him in a mall parking lot and we took his car. I asked him where we were going and he said that it was a surprise. The real surprise was when we got out of the car and he stood next to me. He was not 5"8. He would not have been 5"8 even if he was wearing 3” heels!!!! He was maybe my height. He was also my weight and I think we even had a similar petite body type. Very sexy.... NOT! He told me that he owned his own company and had just bought a house and that everything was complete in his life except for that special someone.

Then he started to lecture me. He lectured me about life in general and then specific things like the fact that I still lived at home. He lectured me about the importance of keeping kosher and he even lectured me about spending too much money on “stupid” things like expensive clothes.

The real kicker was when we started to talk about “our” wedding. I’m not sure how the conversation started as I was tuning in and out for most of his lecturing and I don’t remember agreeing to marry him. He said that he would never let our parents pay for our wedding. I told him that most people in our community have their parents pay for their weddings and that my parents were prepared to pay for the wedding that I called off and for the wedding that my sister is planning and I didn’t see anything wrong with that. He said that he would want to pay for his own wedding. I asked him if he knew how much a Kosher catered wedding would cost. When I told him, he almost fell off his chair. He said that there was no way he could afford a wedding like that as he just bought a house using all of his savings and was trying to pay it off. I told him that perhaps he should do his research before he makes bold statements like “ I will pay for my own wedding”. He tried to look like a macho man and a high roller but ended up disclosing that he doesn’t even have any cash flow right now.

His lecturing and his arguments based on no logic were really beginning to irritate me and I am sure he could pick up on my cold and disengaged responses. That was when he gave me a lecture on the importance of being nice on a date and on first impressions. I thought I was going to punch him in the face! Who the hell did he think he was giving me lectures on my behaviour on a date??? Perhaps if you were not the shortest most obnoxious man on the planet I would be a bit nicer and more receptive! Ever think of that asshole???

When the bill came he pulled out enough cash to cover the whole bill and I pulled out my credit card. He looked at my card and then took back half the money he put out and actually split the bill with me. He asked why I offered and I said “because it was the right thing to do and I am into doing the right thing”. He said “I can appreciate that”. I was about to say “and letting a woman pay on a first date is not the right thing to do you idiot!” But I just smiled and prayed to get to my car as fast as possible. When we left the restaurant he asked if I wanted to go for drinks to another place. I told him that I was tired and needed to get home. He took me back to my car and asked to see me again. I didn’t say anything, I just got out of the car. NO THANK YOU!!!!!